Okay,…well, it’s been six months since my commitment to this blog AND my endeavor of living my best life. As with every well-intentioned plan, there are wild successes, some set-backs and outright failures along the way.
The problem with the idea of living your best life, I’m realizing, is that it isn’t always possible. There are circumstances beyond our control that influence our life, our choices, our outlook, our feelings, our emotions, our relationships, our careers…well, essentially everything! And something I’ve really had to put into practice over the last several years is that we often can’t control our circumstances…BUT, we CAN control how we deal with them – and there within lays the secret.
In fact, you witnessed one of them in my last posting. I had no way of controlling the viewer who, shall we say, wasn’t a big fan. And although his comments did affect me, I worked through it – thanks in part to several of you who sent me such wonderfully warm and supportive comments. Case in point.
Another one refers back to the title of my blog: “A New Year – A New You.” Part of that goal was to share LESS of me with the world by trying to shed this excess weight once and for all. “All the more to love” I try to convince myself, but I think I have managed to sufficiently run that one straight into the ground.
As you know, I joined Medifast at the beginning of the year in order to find the “new me” hiding under my size 12 clothes. I had some pretty good success by dropping 10 pounds. It really didn’t seem that difficult, but after a couple of months (and perhaps you noticed) I ran into stumbling blocks along the way…dinners out, celebrations, a nose that is particularly sensitive to the smell of delicious food and a mouth that feels it necessary to see if my nose is correct! Consequently, I’m back up 5 pounds and trying to remember what it was that I ate that tasted so good that I allowed it to sabotage my goal.
So, as not to fall back into my yo-yo habits that I seem to be accustomed, I’m checking in with you to see how you’re doing. And saying, it’s okay if we’ve fallen, because we can get back up. And if we have to keep doing it, let’s! But let’s also never give up the fight! Living our best life isn’t easy…it takes work, dedication and perseverance….lots and lots of it.
Something I’m doing now is trying to determine WHY I sabatoge and wondering if you’ve ever done the same thing? Here’s what I’m trying to work through; do I do it because I feel like I look pretty good compared to what I looked like before so I feel like I can “treat” myself? Or, am I being short sighted in visualizing my end goal by basking in the weight loss praises of others this soon? Or maybe I simply have very limited willpower when it comes to yummy food and the cycle is familiar – and familiar is comfortable. I’m still working on trying to figure it out and will keep trying until I do.
This is the blessing and the curse of essentially living in a fish bowl. Don’t get me wrong, I can’t imagine doing anything else I love as much as what I do here at KTTC…but let’s face it, high definition cameras ARE NOT my friend! They show every flaw, pound, wrinkle, hair out of place, puffy eyes, blemish, sagging jowls even when one of my false eyelashes comes loose! HD is cruel!! The thing is, I really don’t mind all of that stuff TOO much. Okay, maybe I do or I wouldn’t color my hair, get botox injections and wear hair extensions. Good Lord, apparently I DO care – A LOT! Plus, I think there’s this perception that News Anchors/Reporters have to look and sound perfect… all the time. And when/if we don’t (and we don’t A LOT)…we subject ourselves to the opinions and comments of others. For the most part, I’ve grown past that as I’ve developed a deeper sense of self and find inner beauty to be so much more interesting and fascinating, so I tend to focus primarily on that.
But it doesn’t take away the fact that I STILL want to live the life I imagine for myself. To become the woman I envision…and as long as I’m still standing, I’ll keep fighting the good fight. So, ladies…this is our 6 month check-up…and if you’ve done well, that is so incredibly awesome, I’m proud of you! But, if like me, you’ve stumbled…that’s okay…as long as you get back up.
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This post was written by email@example.com on June 14, 2013